The Fabled Fifth Graders of Aesop Elementary School Read online

Rachel stepped forward.

  Mr. Jupiter smiled. “Rachel,” he said, “I’m pleased to present you with the award for the Most Eloquent Use of Monosyllables.”

  “Pffft,” said Rachel. “Pffft.”

  She accepted her scroll, then, suddenly and unexpectedly, flung her arms around Mr. Jupiter.

  “Pffft,” she said again.

  And then … she whispered, “I’ll miss you, Mr. Jupiter.”

  Breaking away, she rushed back to her seat.

  Mr. Jupiter slumped and ran the sleeve of his silk tunic over his eyes.

  “Harry,” said Miss Turner, “are you able to continue?”

  Mr. Jupiter squared his shoulders. “I’ve faced monsoons, typhoons, and man-eating raccoons,” he replied. “I can get through this.”

  Taking the next scroll, he said in a voice that still cracked a bit, “This year, the Dodecahedron Award for Advanced Mathematical Studies goes to …”

  Stanford stirred in his chair, preparing to rise.

  “Calvin Tallywong,” announced Mr. Jupiter.

  “Calvin?” cried Stanford.

  “Me?” cried Calvin as he made his way across the stage.

  “Yes, you,” replied Mr. Jupiter as he handed over the scroll. “No one in our class has made more advancements, mathematically speaking, than you have.”

  “That’s my boy!” shouted Mr. Tallywong from the audience.

  “Get serious,” snorted Mrs. Binet under her breath. “I’ll be speaking to the principal about this.”

  Onstage, Mr. Jupiter was ready to give the next award. “Stanford Binet,” he called.

  Sulkily, Stanford came forward.

  “Stanford,” said Mr. Jupiter, “you are indeed a stellar student. But there is one area in which you have truly excelled. That’s why I am presenting you with the E.L.T.I.E.P. Award.”

  The other students looked confused.

  “The what award?” Ham finally asked.

  “The Excellence in Language Translation, Interpretation, Explanation, and Patience Award,” translated Stanford excitedly. “Can you believe it? Me? The E.L.T.I.E.P.!”

  “That’s my boy!” shouted Mrs. Binet from the audience.

  “Let me take a picture for you,” offered Mr. Samitch.

  FLASH! FLASH! FLASH!

  Bruce was next. He received the Rubber Chicken Award for Hijinks and Humor.

  Emberly received the Solver of Enigmas, Conundrums, and Cat-astrophes Award.

  And Ashlee A. and Ashleigh B. each received an award for Most Cheer-full Countenance.

  “Rah, rah, sis boom bah!” cheered their families from the crowd.

  And so it went. One by one, the almost–sixth graders accepted their awards.

  Victoria won the Most Likely to Be Seen Draped in Organdy Award.

  “That was obvious,” she sniffed.

  Humphrey won the Echo Award for Repetition and Redundancy.

  “Echo?” he repeated.

  And Melvin won the Junior Contortionist Award (with a gift card for a free bag of Twistorelli Pretzels).

  He accepted his award with his toes.

  Finally, just one student remained.

  “Leonard Wittier,” called Mr. Jupiter.

  Lenny stepped forward and looked up at his teacher.

  “Leonard,” said Mr. Jupiter, his voice cracking with emotion, “I present this papyrus scroll to”—he took a steadying breath—“to the Most Improved Student.”

  Lenny took the award. He searched his mind for a snappy comeback, a funny punch line, a clever zinger. But all he could come up with was “Gee … thanks.”

  In her seat, Mrs. Bunz could barely contain her glee. “It’s almost over,” she squealed. “Any second now.”

  Onstage, Mr. Jupiter struggled with his emotions. “And now,” he finally said, “by the power vested in me as your fifth-grade teacher, I declare that each and every one of you has met the requirements and conditions necessary to graduate from Aesop Elementary School. Therefore, it is my honor to be the first person to call you.… sixth graders!”

  At his words, the auditorium erupted into joyous pandemonium.

  The graduates tossed their scrolls into the air.

  Their parents leaped from the seats and hugged each other.

  And the armpit, washboard, and guinea pig band burst into “Happy Days Are Here Again.”

  Then the teachers, parents, and band members all streamed into the lunchroom for cake.

  Mr. Jupiter hung back. “I’ll meet you in there,” he said to Miss Turner. “I … I … just need a moment to compose myself.” He ducked into the prop room.

  As for the brand-new sixth graders, after picking up their scrolls, they lingered onstage.

  “So we did it,” said Missy.

  “We’re graduates,” said Rose.

  “Sixth graders,” said Amisha.

  From the lunchroom came the sounds of celebration.

  But onstage, all was quiet.

  Finally, Ham said, “Bittersweet.”

  “Uh-huh,” sighed Stanford.

  And then Lil stepped forward. Raising an imaginary cup, she waxed poetic:

  “Oh, dear little school, we’ve learned here so long,

  But now we must bid you goodbye!

  We’ve filled you with laughter; we’ve trilled you with song,

  And occasionally fought, teased, and cried.

  Thy walls they have witnessed math, spelling, and art,

  And have echoed with poetic lines.

  So, our teacher,

  Our classmates,

  Goodbye and boo-hoo,

  Farewell, little Aesop,

  To you.”

  Touched by her words, the others all raised imaginary cups too.

  Then, after a moment of silence, Bernadette said, “You know what I’ll miss most about Aesop Elementary School? Mr. Jupiter.”

  Victoria suddenly burst into tears. “Me too!” she bawled. “Me too.”

  Bernadette pulled a tissue out of her purse. “Here,” she said, handing it to Victoria, “your mascara is dripping all over your satin.”

  “Who cares?” wailed Victoria. “Beauty isn’t everything.”

  It was the perfect opportunity—a chance to fling a real zinger. But—

  “This is no time for jokes,” Lenny said to Bruce.

  Bruce nodded seriously.

  “We’re all going to miss Mr. Jupiter,” Calvin spoke up. “But we’ll just have to look on the bright side. Now that we’ve graduated, Mr. Jupiter can finally go back to his former life of big adventure.”

  “Yeah,” agreed Lenny. “Mr. Jupiter’s ridden an ostrich across Kenya and floated weightless in orbit. Compared to that, two years with us must have been really, really boring.”

  “On the contrary,” said Mr. Jupiter, stepping out of the prop room.

  “Hey,” said Calvin, “you heard us talking.”

  “Every word,” admitted Mr. Jupiter. “And I have a few things I’d like to add, if I may.” Pulling over a folding chair, he sat down with his former students.

  “Adventures,” he began, “aren’t just about rafting down raging rivers and climbing up rugged mountains. They’re also about the people you’ve been on those adventures with—the Sherpa guides, the witch doctors …” He paused, then added, “The students.”

  The sixth graders looked at each other, pleased.

  “Do you mean that teaching us has been an adventure?” asked Lenny.

  Mr. Jupiter smiled, his eyes shining. “My greatest adventure.”

  “You were our greatest adventure too,” snuffled Victoria. She blew her nose with a loud, wet honk.

  Mr. Jupiter grinned. “That’s lovely of you to return the compliment, Victoria, but I’m betting there are lots more extraordinary adventures ahead for each and every one of you.”

  Both teacher and students reflected on their futures for a moment.

  Finally, Mr. Jupiter broke the spell. “I’ve suddenly got a taste for some cake. Shall we?
”

  “But first,” called out Miss Turner as she made her way down the auditorium aisle toward the stage, “let’s take one last class picture.” She held up the camera she’d borrowed from Mr. Samitch. “Ready?”

  Mr. Jupiter and his students wrapped their arms around each other and looked toward the librarian.

  “Everyone say adventure!” shouted Lenny.

  “Adventure!”

  FLASH!

  Mr. Jupiter laughed. “Look out, Aristophanes Middle School, here they come!”

  MORAL: Do boldly what you do at all.

  This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents either are the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, events, or locales is entirely coincidental.

  Copyright © 2010 Candace Fleming

  All rights reserved. Published in the United States by Schwartz & Wade Books, an imprint of Random House Children’s Books, a division of Random House, Inc., New York.

  Schwartz & Wade Books and the colophon are trademarks of Random House, Inc.

  “Ah! Sweet Mystery of Life,” words and music by Rida Johnson Young and Victor Herbert, recorded by Nelson Eddy and Jeanette MacDonald in the 1935 movie Naughty Marietta. “O, my luve’s like a red, red rose,” by Robert Burns, 1759–1796.

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  Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data

  Fleming, Candace.

  The fabled fifth graders of Aesop Elementary School / Candace Fleming. — 1st ed.

  p. cm.

  Summary: Throughout their fifth-grade year, a group of rambunctious students learn fable-like lessons from extraordinary activities, singing guinea pigs, and eccentric teachers, led by the inimitable Mr. Jupiter.

  eISBN: 978-0-375-89497-8

  [1. Schools—Fiction. 2. Teachers—Fiction. 3. Behavior—Fiction.] I. Title.

  PZ7.F59936 Fac 2010

  [Fic]—dc22

  2009031052

  Random House Children’s Books supports the First Amendment and celebrates the right to read.

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